A Perfect 10, Take Two

I am such a vacation tease.

Last year, I flirted with the idea of going away to some tropical resort my husband. Alex-less. Like a naughty Mommy.

I did the online searches, priced out some deals, and narrowed down our destinations. And then I stood Scott up. He knew better than to ask me for another date. I just wasn’t ready to say bye-bye, baby…or hello to Bo.

My twin. Stop laughing, b*tch.

Do you remember how I told you my husband had visions of me running down the beach, corn-rows flopping in the wind, in a nude-colored bathing suit a la Bo Derek in A Perfect 10? He swears it’s me he’s after in this dream, not his pubescent crush (though he’s never hung a poster of me in his bedroom…hmph).

No, he wasn’t drunk when he fell asleep that night, freshie. Guy’s in love, and, in my house, love makes me look a little like Bo when we’re talking about booking a trip. And I really don’t believe him, either.

Although I am still not prepared to rock a nude bathing suit two years post-baby, I think I am maybe kind-of OMG I am freaking out at the thought of it ready to leave Alex…for three nights only. In the care of my Mom. With some liquid courage at the gate before take-off. And maybe a little involuntary seatbelt action once we board.

But then I’ll be fine. Plant my a$$ on a white, sandy beach, near turquoise water and an infinity pool. Serve me fruity drinks and decadent desserts. Let me peek at the thousands of Alex photos on my iPhone from time to time. I swear, I’ll rally.

The question is, where? Where do we go for a three-night getaway from Boston? I want to be transported to paradise within a few hours. Do you have any suggestions? Words of encouragement about abandoning my almost-two-year-old (to squash my ridiculous case of MommyGuilt) are welcome, too.

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